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A message from heart to conscience
Editor:
From the early 1960s to mid 80s, my husband and I raised our four children, two boys and two girls, in what I would describe as a “heterosexual home environment”.
Knowing virtually nothing about “other” possibilities allowed us to treat all our kids as “straight”, just like ourselves.
It wasn’t until 1984 that we had a heart-rending awakening.
Our youngest, at age 16, made an earnest attempt to end his life. We were lucky; he survived.
This shocking and frightening incident was our discovery of human diversity on a whole new level.
In days to follow, he would share how as a boy of 5-6, he felt “different”, but was unable to identify the core of this sensation until he neared the age of puberty.
My mind flashed back to little girl crushes I’d had on boys in the early 1950s. I did not have to keep these feelings a secret.
Now, I realized, our son had been holding his feelings secret for a long time, while trying to pretend to himself and to us that he could be straight. Our ignorance nearly cost us the life of our child.
Regrettably, the message our son received in his “heterosexual home environment” was a distinct “Only Straight People Accepted Here”.
My husband and I had so much to learn and unlearn.
In our 20 plus years since, we have had our minds challenged and broadened.
We have become avid supporters, advocates, and educators where our gay, lesbian, bi and trans (GLBT) brothers and sisters are concerned.
In our learning, there is one truth we do not question. It is that our influence as a straight couple cannot change the orientation of our son, nor will it change the orientation of any non-heterosexual person we meet.
Likewise, those of GLBT persuasion cannot influence our straight orientation.
From this truth, we have concluded that whom we are attracted to is not a choice, but rather a continuation of our normal development begun at conception.
As unique human beings, then, our personal and very private rights to love another belong to us alone.
We, every one of us, should be free to choose our life partners without fear of laws restricting our natural birthrights.
I am appalled by this second attempt (Prop. 102) to single out our GLBT citizens of Arizona for exemption from living out their dreams.
It is an absolute travesty of justice that any human being should be denied the same rights of equality that I, as a privileged straight woman, receive.
The sin is not in whom one loves. The sin is with those who want their narrowly defined religious beliefs enshrined in the Arizona Constitution.
Proposition 102, if passed, will set a dangerous precedent and will only further serve to marginalize our equally deserving GLBT citizens.
I ask everyone with conscience to please Vote NO on Prop. 102.
Karen Kressley, Sahuarita
From the early 1960s to mid 80s, my husband and I raised our four children, two boys and two girls, in what I would describe as a “heterosexual home environment”.
Knowing virtually nothing about “other” possibilities allowed us to treat all our kids as “straight”, just like ourselves.
It wasn’t until 1984 that we had a heart-rending awakening.
Our youngest, at age 16, made an earnest attempt to end his life. We were lucky; he survived.
This shocking and frightening incident was our discovery of human diversity on a whole new level.
During a counseling session weeks later, our son revealed his long-kept secret. He was gay, NOT straight.
In days to follow, he would share how as a boy of 5-6, he felt “different”, but was unable to identify the core of this sensation until he neared the age of puberty.
My mind flashed back to little girl crushes I’d had on boys in the early 1950s. I did not have to keep these feelings a secret.
Now, I realized, our son had been holding his feelings secret for a long time, while trying to pretend to himself and to us that he could be straight. Our ignorance nearly cost us the life of our child.
Regrettably, the message our son received in his “heterosexual home environment” was a distinct “Only Straight People Accepted Here”.
My husband and I had so much to learn and unlearn.
In our 20 plus years since, we have had our minds challenged and broadened.
We have become avid supporters, advocates, and educators where our gay, lesbian, bi and trans (GLBT) brothers and sisters are concerned.
In our learning, there is one truth we do not question. It is that our influence as a straight couple cannot change the orientation of our son, nor will it change the orientation of any non-heterosexual person we meet.
Likewise, those of GLBT persuasion cannot influence our straight orientation.
From this truth, we have concluded that whom we are attracted to is not a choice, but rather a continuation of our normal development begun at conception.
As unique human beings, then, our personal and very private rights to love another belong to us alone.
We, every one of us, should be free to choose our life partners without fear of laws restricting our natural birthrights.
I am appalled by this second attempt (Prop. 102) to single out our GLBT citizens of Arizona for exemption from living out their dreams.
It is an absolute travesty of justice that any human being should be denied the same rights of equality that I, as a privileged straight woman, receive.
The sin is not in whom one loves. The sin is with those who want their narrowly defined religious beliefs enshrined in the Arizona Constitution.
Proposition 102, if passed, will set a dangerous precedent and will only further serve to marginalize our equally deserving GLBT citizens.
I ask everyone with conscience to please Vote NO on Prop. 102.
Karen Kressley, Sahuarita
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